How to shift an “off” day to “on”

No one ever sets off to have an “off” day.  You are just going about living your life and one thing leads to another, or so it seems.  If you are on the path to living your life more consciously so you can embrace more of your potential, your work is to bring awareness to what is really going on. 

What is really going on during an off day is that you likely lowered your standards.  Of course you are not going to go about your day thinking “Today would be a great day to lower my standards.” So how does this happen?

Believe it or not, you are most likely going to lower your standards when you are going after something you want.  You see, in your mind sometimes to get what you want, you “make exceptions.”  Making exceptions is fine except when you go against what feels good and right to you. The problem is that it is way too easy to make excuses even if your exception does not feel right to you. 

Take me for example.  Yesterday, I had an appointment with a really well-known figure regarding his participation in the next New Consciousness Audio Series.  Unfortunately, the appointment time was incorrectly scheduled and if I wanted to fit in to his very busy schedule, I needed to rearrange some appointments on my end.  I knew at the time, I didn’t feel comfortable making changes to my schedule.  It just didn’t feel right.  Still, I did as I thought of how wonderful it would be to have him as a part of the series. 

Against my better judgment of my inner guidance, rearrangements were made.  And you know what?  The rearrangements threw off my day.   

Now for the kicker, HE NEVER CALLED!

You see it is these little instances where boundaries weaken and you can easily have no clue.   After all you want to be a good person, so you think you should give people the benefit of the doubt, be compassionate etc….  What happens is then that you are likely going to blow off your contribution to the problem.  You will say to yourself something like “It is no big deal.”

You are correct in that it is no big deal to the other person involved.  Yet, the truth is that instances in which you lower your boundaries should matter to you. 

In my case, I could have easily forgotten about it and just have my assistant reschedule with his assistant. No big deal right?  WRONG!

The big deal is that how I feel going about my day matters to me.  Being in flow with my work makes a big difference in my day and I don’t like feeling “off.” 

What is key to remember is that this has everything to do with my actions and not his.  If I would have listened to my inner guidance, this wouldn’t have impacted my day as it did. It would have been “on.”

You are going to mess up at times and not listen to your inner guidance, just as I did.  If you want to remain living emotionally unconscious (like many do) you will easily blow off lowering your standards.  You won’t recognize how you disregarded your inner wisdom and then you will wonder why life at times feels like such a struggle.

Living emotionally conscious, however, you can choose to recognize your part in the equation.  When you do, you are living more empowered because you see how you can handle circumstances in a way that is in greater alignment with your essence. 

And this, my friends, is exactly how healthy boundaries are created! It is through the times when you dismiss your boundaries that can affirm the importance of boundaries in your life. 

It is just like how successful people have experienced a lot of failures prior to their success.  The same holds true with your boundaries.  People with healthy boundaries that supports them to live their best life have become conscious of the times when their boundaries were lax.  The reason is that in both cases, you learn and grow – IF YOU ARE WILLING & AWARE!

Of course, I became aware of this instance by recognizing my annoyance, which was really just light weight anger.  Utilizing my anger from an emotionally conscious state, I realized my feelings were about me claiming more of my power.  Through that understanding, I claimed back my power through re-establishing boundaries that feel good and right to me. 

For me, the person who blew off our appointment has nothing to do with how I felt.  He was simply the vehicle of how I was supposed to remember my truth to support me as my work progresses.  The stakes may become higher, but my truth remains the same.  Evidently, I needed that reminder!  Once I got it, my day went from feeling “off” to feeling back “on!”

You need reminders when you are on your path to grow and evolve.  Your emotions are there to support you to stay on track.  Choose to live emotionally conscious to embrace the power within you that will allow you to turn around an “off” day and get back “on” track to living your best life!

Live Emotionally Conscious – Live Exceptionally Well,

Want to Feel More Excitement about Your Life?

Don’t you love the feeling of excitement running through your body.  You are optimistic, ready to move forward and utilize that energy within you to make things happen.  This is actually the purpose of excitement – to propel you forward!

Believe it or not, your fear is the same energy as excitement.  The only difference is that your ego has taken a hold of the energy and turned it into what you recognize as fear.  You know the ego is involved with fear because you’ll feel weighed down, uncertain, scared, anxious or sad. 

From an emotional consciousness standpoint, you recognize the true purpose to your fears.  They are present to alert you that you are buying into an ego message.  Congratulations – just recognizing this is a huge step forward!

Now, to transmute the fear into the energy of excitement, all you need to do is understand the underlying message of the ego.

When this happens to me, I turn to my feelings to help me uncover the truth. Nothing is better than recognizing sadness as loving guidance for you to get the clarity you need.  What I love about feeling every emotion as love is that the process allows you to get very specific as to what is your vulnerable spot that the ego is trying to protect. 

Your sadness supports you to gain clarity and see the truth to the matter rather than the false story of your ego.   Fear is then transformed back to excitement because the energy that you have given to your ego is now reverted back to your essence.  When your essence is free to do what it came here to do, you will be blown away at your ability to move mountains!  That is the energy that awaits you!!

What this means for you is to begin to see each and every fear as opportunity.  The opportunity is to understand where, why and how your energy is leaking toward your ego.  The time has come to reclaim that energy back to serving you and utilizing your excitement to even more deeply claim what fulfills you.

The good news is that fear is a normal part to growth.  I feel it all the time and I utilize my fear to support me to reach my desires.  You can too!

Begin by reminding and stating to yourself of the following:

“Each time I feel fear, it is an opportunity for me to expand and own more of my personal power and truth.”

You and only you can make the decision if you are going to use fear to transform you or keep you stuck.  Your fate is in your hands!  Now that is something to feel excited about – you have the choice to claim all of your potential!

 Live Emotionally Conscious – Live Exceptionally Well,

Michelle

What Does Generosity of Spirit Look Like to You?

The holidays are the time of year when you naturally feel more inclined to be generous.  You want to share your gratitude for all that you have been given, as well as a sense of love and appreciation for those you care about.  A huge message I keep getting over and over is about being generous but not in the typical buy presents kind-of-way. 

Presents are great and fun to receive.  Yet, there is something a little extra special to giving of yourself in a way that touches your heart because the giving authentically came from you.  I’ve been asking myself what are those little extra doses of generosity that I can give out.  Sometimes money is involved, sometimes it is not.  What I like about the generosity of spirit behind the giving is that often times, only I will know or that the giving is uniquely between me and another. 

In asking myself “How can I share of myself and my resources in a way that stretches me a little bit more?,” I have found two great gifts.    The first gift is a deeper level of trust and knowingness that I can give of myself in ways that my rational mind would tell me I cannot.  For me, this means such an intense demonstration of how loved and cared for I am by God. 

The second gift is realizing that this generosity of spirit also applies to me.  In other words, how can you be generous in spirit to you?  When you remember you are not only supposed to be generous to others but also to yourself, you will feel that deepening of love and faith that the holidays are truly about. 

Here is to you creating a generous and blessed holiday season!

With Faith and Love,

Michelle

PS:  Would you mind being generous with your ideas by sharing what generosity of spirit looks like to you?  Add your comment and let’s share with one another simple ways to be generous to each other and yourself, as we end this calendar year.

How High is Your Pain Tolerance When It Comes to Stress?

Did you ever play those games when you were a kid to see how far you could bend back your fingers without giving up in pain?  How about allowing a relative or friend to keep hitting you harder and harder to see how long you could take it without giving up?  In both of these cases, the more pain you could tolerate, the stronger you were viewed.  I am sure at one point or another you gave it a try in order to avoid being called a wimp.

These silly games you play as a kid imprints a lasting message in your psyche.  The message is you are somehow better if you are tough and learn to “suck up” the pain or discomfort that you are feeling.   This message has been reiterated by adults as well because of the belief that you need to be able tolerate pain because life is not always fair.

The unfortunate outcome is that you learn how to tolerate your pain too well.  The result is suffering with your careers, your relationships and/or your sense of self due to your great tolerance of pain.  You have learned loud and clear that you are better off sucking it up.  You pull yourself up by the boot straps and try to move forward all the while ignoring the pain the best you can. 

What you don’t think about is how this will impact you in the long-term because you have been trained not to.  There is this pain reliever/aspirin commercial that demonstrates this so well.  The storyline is that this man suffers from pains that hold him back from accomplishing what he wants.  Presto — when he takes his pain reliever, we see him strong, being able to climb any mountain and accomplish his dream.   The message is that here is an easy way to cover up your pain that allows you to achieve all that you desire.  What I am thinking is this poor guy – he thinks he is being so strong by pushing himself past his limits and he is going to wake up to some major pain possibly even hurting himself physically to the point where it is beyond repair.  This commercial reiterates what you have all been taught to believe, which is if you toughen up and cover up your pain, you will then be able to get what you want.  This may work for the short-term but in the long run you end up hurting yourself even more. 

By ignoring your pain there is another part deep down within you that believes in the message of the pain rather than hearing the truth.  The truth is that your emotions want to share with you how to alleviate the pain for good.   Rather than hear this message, you are too focused on putting your best self forward all the while ignoring the hurt you feel.  What this actually does is keep you stuck and that is the sad part because it doesn’t have to be that way.

There are few people who are born without having the sensitivity to pain in their bodies. Their inability to feel the pain puts them in great danger and they end up getting hurt often.  Others have to keep a close watch on them because they do not register the signals that tell them what is taxing or hurting them.

I believe our society as a whole is suffering because we have tampered with the amazing gift of our emotional sensitivity.  Rather than picking up on the emotional signals that tell you when something is not good, you tolerate what isn’t good for you.  Worse yet is how you tell yourself to get over it, move on, think positively or be the better person and rise above it.  The reality is that you are just telling yourself that you are not sick of these circumstances enough to make a change.  In other words, you are telling your pain to bring on some more because you can and will take more pain. 

Once you have reached the point where you are so tired of the pain and so exhausted from fighting, only then will change occur.  The gift is that your pain doesn’t have to reach that point in order for you to take action.  So what is it going to be for you — a high pain tolerance or a low pain tolerance? 

My hope is that you will join me in having a low pain tolerance.  With a low pain tolerance you will recognize your sadness, anger or frustration more often.  The difference is that you will see this as a gift that will help you to live your life even better.  Trust me, it is not the emotions that are so painful rather it is the truth that you are trying to deny.  But remember the truth will always set you free.  Doesn’t living freely sound better than living chained to the pain?

Live Authentically – Live Exceptionally Well,

Michelle

Finding Your Sweet Spot – In Meditation that Is!

Come on admit it, when you first saw the words “sweet spot” did your mind immedicately go to sex?  (Okay, mine did!)  Here is the gift in having both psychotherapy training and life coaching.  I can talk about very personal points while addressing the spiritual.  This is what I came up with:  I believe there are some great comparisons to finding your sexual sweet spot and your meditative one.  Because I believe it is more challenging to find your meditative sweet spot, that is where I am going to keep my focus!

First, you may be wondering what I mean by your sweet spot when it comes to mediation.  Your meditative sweet spot is where you are flowing in some zone that simultaneously has no feeling yet, feels extremely good.  For me, my meditative sweet spot also feels like home.  To find it, there are some similarities to finding your sexual sweet spot as well as your meditative one.  Here they are:

1) The more you practice, the easier you find it

2) You can’t just jump into your sweet spot, it takes patience

3) You need to be in the present moment

Although my meditative sweet spot can be more allusive, it is worth the patience and practice.  Sometimes, I can ride the energetic wave that I am on and sometimes my mind and/or feelings distract me.  More often than not the later is the case.  Nevertheless, not being in my meditative zone does not mean that the mediation was ineffective.  Just quieting myself, even if I only last 5 minutes, does wonders.  It also affirms my commitment to connecting with my spiritual self.  Allow yourself to learn to ride the meditative wave.  Watch it build and then you will find your sweet spot as well!

Live Authentically – Live Exceptionally Well,

Michelle