Reflection of 2010 and into 2011
The end of the year is a wonderful time to become a witness to the life you have created. By reflecting upon the miracles/gifts as well as the areas that challenged you in 2011, you open yourself further to the conscious creation process. Many people like to jump in and start focusing on goals or resolutions for the new year. Doing so without reflection, however, will not give you the momentum you need to make lasting change.
To begin with, focus on these major aspects of your life listed below. Make a column as to how each component felt to you in 2010 and where (if any) you have deeper desires toward that aspect of your life in 2011.
- Spirituality – How do I feel in regard to a sense of spiritual connection? How well am I able to trust?
- Relationships – How do my relationships feel (currently) as well as how you want them to expand upon in 2011?
- Intimate
- Immediate Family (ie kids)
- Extended Family
- Friends
- Career – What have I brought forward this year & what do I want to expand upon
- Physical Health – How do I currently feel in my body & is there a way I can better serve my body in order for my body to better serve me?
- Emotional Well-Being – Do my feelings and fears feel supportive to me? Are there still areas where I feel emotionally weighted down at times, if so what are the triggers? What can I do to allow my emotions to serve me in 2011?
- Sense of Self – In what ways do I demonstrate love and self-worth currently? Is there more authentic expression ready to be revealed in 2011?
- Free Time – In which ways that I currently spend my time serve my highest good? Is there more ways to bring out sensual expression, pleasure and joy in 2011?
- Home – How does my home currently support my highest good? Is there a greater desire to have my home more fully support me in 2011? If so, in which way?
- Other – Anything specific you may want to address not covered in the other categories – add here
By looking at your successes in 2010, you can identify what worked for you, how you are motivated and the external components that supported you to move forward. Being a witness to, rather than judging, where you remain challenged, you gain greater insight by asking yourself the following:
A. What do you believe were factors that negatively impacted your ability to move toward your desires?
B. How can you empower yourself better to get the support you need?
C. Are you setting yourself up to succeed, as you did with previous successes?
D. Do you need further guidance?
Next, prioritize what has the greatest significance to you at this time. This is important because you want the majority of your energy (at least 80%) going toward your top 3 desires. (This may only be 2 desires if the ones you are undertaking are major life changers!) Allow the remaining to be longer term shifts that you give some energy toward ( the remaining 20%) and see what small steps you want to take throughout the year to give some momentum to those desires.
For your top priorities, utilize the information gathtered from questions A-D to address what additional support you need to move forward. Begin each week with reflecting upon what your next step is toward reaching your desire. Many people get lost in trying to figure out how to get to the end result when you truly only need to know your next step. Establish a day each week to weekly reflect upon whether or not how you are going about moving toward your desire is working. Tweek your plan for the following week given that information, along with determining what your next step is. By doing this weekly check-in, you are going to find two things:
- You are more attuned to your needs and challenges
- You are given the guidance you need to take another step forward by staying attuned to yourself
Don’t forget to honor each week the small shifts that are created. The shifts in which you know of even though others cannot yet see the external results, are the most significant. This is the real route to create life altering shifts!
May 2011 be filled with the blessings you have deep within your heart!
Live Emotionally Conscious – Live Exceptionally Well,
The Gift of the Season – Access Your Divine Spark!
Silence…ahh, sweet silence. The silence I crave is not simply slowing down. You know as well as I do, you can slow yourself down, while your mind keeps going. During the holidays, for many of you, silence is hard to come by as life seems overly full (as do our bellies). Others, on the other hand, may feel the depth of silence, when life feels less full than you would desires it to be. In either case, neither describes silence. You can have time to yourself, yet your mind can be filled with too much noise.
In the northern hemisphere, where I currently live, the length of darkness we are entering into supports us to create inner silence. This cannot be done by simply slowing yourself down. Creating inner silence is a type of miracle in and of itself. I have been practicing meditation 6 days a week, for over eight years. Obviously, I am no yogi, yet I have enough experience under my belt to know what a gift true silence from within is. Sometimes, you grasp the silence for just a few fleeting moments. Other times, you can be swept away by the gift of silence without realizing how much time has elapsed. During the holidays, the later type of silence is few and far between.
Just as nature has a period in which the external conditions lie dormant in order to prepare for transformation beneath the surface, so do we. The darkness outside, is beckoning for you to go to the darkness inside and be swept away by the silence residing within you. What you will find is a light guiding you, telling you more about your true path and the next steps for you to take.
Whether you are Christian or not, you have likely heard of the Christmas song, “Silent Night.” I have heard and sung the song so many times myself, yet rarely paid attention to the point being made. Silence is where miracles are born from and occur. Silence is the core of the potential that awaits within you – the same as it does for humanity as a whole.
Silence is a gift that cannot be created, yet can be found. No matter what your spiritual beliefs are, silence is a true gift the season offers. This is the time of year when the Divine Spark within you is waiting to be found at a deeper layer. Take this time to go within and discover what miracles are waiting to manifest through you. Only you can decide if the silence within you is worth finding.
Here’s to celebrating the silence within!
Happiest of Holidays to You!
Be A Light Unto Yourself: A Response to a Question Regarding Living Your Passion & Loneliness
Date: Wed, Sep 22, 2010 at 7:45 PM
Subject: Advice on Life Passion
To: support@michellebersell.com
Hi! My name is Mel!
I was reading on “the key to find and/or elevate your passion toward life” about “non-doing.” I feel like I entered that space not too long ago. I am in my late 20′s, a single young lady w/a Master’s in Gerontology. I work as a Care Manager. I am really devoted to my church, where my heart and passion is. I love to lead Praise & Worship and I’m definitely interested in growing spiritually. I have many hopes-marriage, better job, etc. I have an awesome, supportive family and a few “close” supportive friends. I’ve been alone more lately, hoping to get a grasp on things, life, my passion. I saw the article said to send for advice, any thoughts?
Thank You Sincerely,
Mel
Hi Mel,
“Be a light unto yourself” is the phrase that comes to mind when I think of your struggle between hope for the future and your sense of loneliness currently. The truth is Mel, you are not alone with feeling lonely. During times of transitional change, the vast majority of people go through a period of loneliness. The reason is because you are shifting your life to be in greater alignment with your truth.
Experiencing loneliness while consciously evolving is one of those topics that remains under addressed, while being extremely common. Think about for a moment what you are actually doing – you are shedding old skin and claiming more and more of what matters to you. As you grow, others may not be ready to go on that journey with you – at least not right away. You can move forward without them being right by your side, while trusting their time will come. In the short-term, you may feel more alone. In the long-term, you ultimately create relationships that support you to be the highest version of you. Plus, when those you care about are ready to move forward as well, they will be turning to you for support!
From a spiritual perspective, your loneliness is a preparation period supporting you to fulfill your life’s work. You need this time where there are less distractions so you hone in on what you are feeling, what works for you and what absolutely doesn’t, and what moves you. This is a time for creativity and exploration from the core of your essence.
I have worked with many, many people as they evolve toward finding their passion. A common thread is a sense of loneliness, whether they were in their 20’s or 60’s! In every case, what needed to be done was to live the meaning to “Be a light unto yourself.” What this means is you must go within to your internal and eternal light that exists within you. Let your light be your guide. Once you clear the clutter, what you will find is a field of possibility that lies ahead for you. Your work is to tend to the field so that it becomes the most fertile to grow your dreams. This means weeding out that which no longer serves you and bring into your life more that will.
I remember when I too went through a period of loneliness, which happened to be around your age as well . Some of the most profound growth I had ever experienced occurred during this time. I only wish I had someone there telling me to both savor this time as well as know that it will soon shift.
Like falling in love, you only get a couple of these types of experiences. This may be it for you where you get to discover yourself to this degree. Honor your circumstance by turning to your feelings to be your guidance and you will find yourself shifting to a life that feels greater fulfillment and fuller than you could have ever imagined!
Live Emotionally Conscious – Live Exceptionally Well,
Find Greater Joy & Fulfillment through Connection!
Connection is the key to expansion and December is such a wonderful month to connect! I know for many of you, your plates can feel like you have enough servings for four people instead of just you. As we step into a month that is known for hustling and bustling, slow down to reflect how your energy is best used.
What will bring you joy, fulfillment, or laughter?
What does your essence feel called to do prior to the end of 2010?
Because who you are is a one-of-a-kind ball of energy, you are deeply needed in the world. How you are needed may appear simple at times, like almost anyone could fill in. However, the fact you are in any given circumstance brings unique perspective, talents, feelings and actions that no one else can offer in the same manner.
Often times, your ego will dismiss how significant you really are, how you really do touch others and the numerous ways your energy can be applied. You hear reasons in your mind as to why you should not offer your energy. I understand. I get tired too, especially during the holidays. This is a signal to get back on track to what will bring you greater internal wealth. Often times, energy is leaked on trying to create external circumstances that appear abundant rather than feel abundant.
To get back on track, do the following:
- Think about how you can give of yourself that has nothing to do about the holidays. You just do it because it feels right to you.
- Reach out to those who need support. This can be anything from supporting those with less material access to calling up a family member.
- Chose joy over perfection. So what if your holiday cards got out late if it meant you had time to bake cookies with the kids. Think of memories created through personal connection over what our should-do list tells you to-do.
- Be open to experiences that scare you due to the fact you are being called to go outside your comfort zone. This is an amazing gift for you to see more of your true potential!
When you connect to others in this way, you expand, your energy increases and you feel greater personal empowerment. What a great way to end the year!
You are so deeply needed. You are offered numerous opportunities to connect in ways that may seem insignificant to your ego, yet can have profound effect in other people’s lives. Choose what will fuel you internally through the expansiveness of connection and you will create a fulfilling, memorable and joy-filled December!
Happy Holidays!
Live Consciously – Live Exceptionally Well,
Why Healthy Boundaries Lead to Greater Happiness!
Boundaries are not about having a brick wall (or some other block you cannot penetrate) around you. Healthy boundaries simply allow you to filter out what isn’t for your highest good. In any type of relationship whether familial, marital or friendship you want to have healthy boundaries in order to ensure the following:
A) Mutual Respect
B) Trust
C) Connection
Having these components in a relationship allow you to be able to work through any disagreement. More importantly, having great relationships allows you to continue to flourish, see the gifts within you reflected through another and grow as an individual. Your relationships can be an energy drain or a source of replenishment to support you to remember the full truth of your potential!
When I was on Fox, I spoke of some deal breakers (to see interviews go to http://www.michellebersell.com/html/video07.html ). What we didn’t have time to go into was in any relationship how a breach of trust without remorse AND being willing to do something different is truly reason to move on. This can happen with infidelity as well as with irresponsible financial decisions in a marriage. In friendships, trust can be broken as well through something as life consuming as a drug problem or as basic as gossip. In these cases, you have to know your limitations in that you cannot change others, yet you can make decisions to change your circumstances.
To create healthy boundaries you must a) know what feels good and right versus bad/off and wrong to you b) be willing to express your feelings to others and c)stay firm in your convictions by not becoming attached to others reactions
Creating healthy boundaries in the short-term can certainly be challenging. In the long-term, however, you are setting yourself up to have ideal circumstances to feel the joy of life in the company of others who are a true reflection of love!
Happy Relating & Boundary Creating!
Before I uncovered the truth to our emotions, I would become paralyzed by my feelings and fears, even though I had been professionally trained as a psychotherapist and life coach!
