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How I Repelled What I Wanted the Most!

07 Mar 2013, by michelle in Uncategorized

Is there an area of your life that you have wanted to change but feel like you were spinning your wheels?

Maybe it was desiring to have more intimacy in your relationship, have more financial success, or find your life’s purpose.  Then you find yourself rationalizing that you are doing okay just how things are because what you have tried hasn’t worked.

Trust me when I say, I know how that feels.  As much as we say we are okay without this, if we were to be honest, a part of us isn’t.

At one point in my life, I felt really stuck about a desire I deeply wanted in my life.  Unbeknownst to me, there was something I was doing that was actually repelling me from my desire rather than making it happen.

Remember your emotions are the fuel to your intentions. If you are judging or trying to get rid of the negative half of your feelings,you are operating from fear rather than love.

If you are at the point where change has got to happen, because you are tired of feeling like you are repelling what you want in one or more areas of your life, I invite you to check out my one-of-a-kind Unrecognizable You Partnership Program here:

http://mbersell.wpengine.com/coaching/

Please, leave your comments below.  I’d love to hear about how your thoughts on what I shared!
With Love,
2 COMMENTS
  • Judy

    Michelle,
    I always enjoy your blogs/videos and your most recent one is no exception. After a bit of reflection on your message of the three keys: mind set, faith and emotion, I felt compelled to put forward a thought that is not so much defeatist as accepting in perhaps what could be considered the Buddhist teaching of acknowledging and living with the pain of life as well as the joy.

    I’ve written you once before and I’ll try and be brief. I am a widow of 13 years (as of 42 but had young kids to raise most of that time) and have been actively (on and off) trying to create opportunity to meet another partner. My marriage was wonderful and fulfilling so no emotions over not being good enough, belief or mind set saboteurs.

    My struggle over the past year or so is that no matter my mind set, belief and emotional state (genuinely presenting myself positively to the universe at large) it doesn’t seem to be my fate to meet someone else. I will admit that some experiences on dating sites, singles events, speed dating or whatever the venue was for me to meet new people, have caused me to doubt who I am and what I have to offer. When that happens I take a step back for several months or a year and recognize that if the effort has a negative impact to my emotional well-being then I’m better off not doing that.

    Here is my struggle: my authentic truth is that I’m a person who desires and values having a partner in life – for many reasons; my reality is that I do not have a partner and this is partly out of my control. I can control what I do and how I present myself to the world but I can’t control how I’m perceived by others or how they present themselves.

    I am working so hard at accepting my reality when the truth is that I don’t want to accept it at all. It causes negative emotions of course because of the fear of my reality being the end game, not just a temporary situation.

    I guess what my thought is that I can sincerely practice F.E.E.L. as it relates to how I deal with life and how I take care of myself. I can acknowledge that the validation and love I need comes from me, not from someone else. I am happy with who I am and have validation from my friends and family if any is needed; I am more than capable of living independently on my own as finding things I enjoy doing alone or with others is not my problem. But trying to do away with the pain and disappointment of not having a partner seems to me to be denying who I am. And so the challenge is accepting it as part of my life – as much a part of me as the love I have for my kids (not on the same scale but for example).

    You might suggest that I wouldn’t feel the disappointment if I wasn’t afraid of my reality being forever, but I am suggesting that to defeat that fear is defeating a truth of who I am – a person who wants a partner in her life- and the truth that there are no guarantees in life no matter what we do or how we live our life.

    Do you ever address accepting what we would otherwise choose not to accept?

    Judy

    • michelle

      Hi Judy,

      In order to F.E.E.L., you must feel everything. This absolutely includes your longing for a partner. Your disappointment in not having a partner is very real and is trying to guide you to deepen your relationship with love.

      Your longing is guiding you to go deeper within you. It may be time to receive some support around this in order that you feel even greater peace.

      Thank you for sharing so openly and honestly. Doing so is important not only for your own process but I am sure will help many others who feel similar to you.

      Warm Regards,
      Michelle