Dance to Your Heart’s Song

I know turning 40 usually means checking out wrinkles and freaking out about aging.  I see the fine lines (some deeper than others truth be told) but they just seem so boring compared to the song that is in my heart that wants me to jump in and DANCE with reckless abandon!   There is a song that is playing in all of our hearts.  Some of you may be just hearing it for the first time, while others of you know it so well, yet you’ve been hesitant to go  all in or maybe you haven’t felt adequately prepared to learn a new, more intricate dance move that is an integral part of your song’s full expression.

There is a way, however, to figure out what is being called for you to do next that is coming from your song.  All you need to do is being willing to see the one area of your life that your heart has longed to create change toward and hasn’t been able to make it happen.  This is your next step, the next move for you to master.   You do this by following these steps on how to more fully      dance to your heart’s song:

1. List out the reasons and ways you have tried to make that change happen that didn’t work.
2. Honestly reflect how those attempts have made you feel.  Oftentimes we get into a story that turns us into the victim or poor me.  If you see this, this is great for two reasons:  a) because you are not denying it & b) because that is where you have room to claim more of your power.
3. In what way would it feel good for you to take more responsibility toward creating the change that you desire?
4. What is your song leading you to do next?
5. How does it make you feel when you listen to your song’s lead?
6. In what way do you try to tear apart and void out messages in #3, 4 or 5?
7. What is getting you closer to your goal, following #2 & #6 or sticking with #3, #4 & #5?
8. Claim and affirm your choice.  Set up reminders that support your new decision and new level of responsibility toward your life!

Here is how this has played out in my life recently.  I have longed to create greater financial stability and savings in my life.  Even though I tried to live consciously regarding how I spent money, I didn’t feel like I was getting where I wanted to when it came toward saving for our retirement and college or being able to comfortably afford international travel with my family.  My past failed attempts made me feel like saving and investing weren’t my forte and so I put them on my husband to worry about, after all, he did that naturally =)!  “Plus,” I told myself “I trust I will always be taken care of by God/Universe.”  Yet, deep down,  a part of me knew I wasn’t doing my part.

When I asked myself how I can begin taking more responsibility, I came to realize the power I had to set an even stronger tone in my family toward living in greater alignment with our core desires and values.  When I listened more fully to my song, what I heard was an even stronger desire to serve and lead at a new level.  This made me feel energized, alive and excited about my path.  My song gave me even greater clarity.  Right then, I knew the old reasons that told us we were already doing enough were really just excuses.  My husband and I set new boundaries around our spending AND that we would affirm our songs by asking each other two questions each night: Did you serve today?  Did you lead today?

I can’t tell you how inspiring it feels to take action toward living in even greater alignment to our hearts’ songs.  We celebrated by going down to Lake Michigan with a bottle of wine, chips and salsa, talking for hours.  It was a super inexpensive date indeed, but one of our best ever!

No matter what age you are, you too can listen in more closely to your heart’s song.  Listen to what it is reminding you about yourself and how you can live your life.  Then DANCE full-out along with it!

Dancing together in love, leadership and service,

 

PS: Ever read Oriah Mountain Dreamer’s “The Dance”?  I have it in my office and encourage you to check it out for additional inspiration to DANCE to your heart’s song!

 

 

Move out of Control and into Flow

Oh my goodness, so many of us love to control, plan out, and analyze– all of which are great qualities to have. Yet, let’s face it, too much “thinking things through” can also lead to stagnation and even boredom. Rather than letting our logical, rational brain have full control of our lives, we need balance.

To achieve a more balanced state, we need to consciously choose to shift gears from always pushing or forging ahead to opening ourselves up to a state of allowing, which is often called “flow.” From a flow state, there is room for spontaneity, intuition and creativity to come forward.

If this sounds too touchy-feely, or all fun and games, it isn’t. Although a flow state is known to occur for more artistic types, athletes, sales people, even doctors have shared how they enter a “flow zone.” In this zone, you feel “on,” where you trust what is coming forward from inside of you and lose yourself in the process. The result is you are more effective at what you do.

My guess is you are wondering “How on earth do I make that happen?” Well, here’s the deal – you can’t make flow happen. Flow is an authentic state that cannot be forced. There are, however, ways you can encourage more flow states in your life.

Here’s my top 3 Ways to Shift from Control to Flow:

#1 Listen to Your Feelings

I can’t say this enough – those who are in the know when it comes to personal growth recognize emotions as a HUGE, POWERFUL ALLY! Too often times, you ignore or set aside feelings because, well, you don’t like what they are saying. Let’s face it, feelings, especially those that challenge you, can occur at inconvenient times. A much easier approach is to ignore, deny or try to rise above what you feel. In doing so, however, you are not aligning yourself with your authentic self. Instead, you are subconsciously judging and unconsciously choosing fear. Your fear is in what these feelings mean to you, or what they bring up within you that you don’t like.

There is another choice, which is to listen to your feelings from a higher consciousness perspective. From a higher consciousness perspective, challenging feelings are viewed as a signal with an underlying message that is present to support you. In this way, you can stay true to how you feel without getting lost in fear or ego drama. What this is doing is actually moving your internal energy from a place that doesn’t serve and stifles you to one in which your internal energy flows in congruence with your higher self.

From a higher consciousness understanding, your feelings are present to get you back in alignment with your authentic self. Challenging feelings indicate you are buying into fear more than your truth. They also give you the direction you need to move back in alignment with your authentic self. By learning to follow the higher consciousness message, you create internal balance. From this place of internal balance, there is room for passion, new insight and energy to come through – all of which are present to support you to live from a flow state more and more often.

#2 Prioritize Your Essence

Listen to your essence – that authentic, wise, love-filled part of you. What does that aspect of you desire? This part of you often gets ignored (sometimes for years!). Let’s face it, you have responsibilities that are always seeking and winning your attention. I am not talking about being irresponsible here. You still have things that need to get done yet, who says joy, play and your essence can’t come first?

#3 Practice Allowing

What do you like to control or plan? What would it be like for you to let go of the grip a bit? Rather than go, go, go how about rest, observe, listen and witness? Make room for spontaneity and see what life can bring you.

Just compare the two pictures and decide which feels more fulfilling, abundant and power-filled.   Allow your essence to be your guide that you trust over your ego’s need to control and in turn experience more of you and the life your heart desires to create!

Thank you so much for connecting with me here. I am happy to be on this journey with you!

Living Emotionally Conscious Together -

How to Work through Confusion

Watch my latest video by clicking here
How to Work through Confusion

In case you want the step-by-step process, here’s what you need to do:

Step 1: Recognize that you are feeling confused, stuck, uncertain or lost. Energetically, your energy is tied up. To untie the knot, you have to stop the energy that is leaking out toward blame or excuses and instead look within yourself.

Step 2: Acknowledge that your challenges are real others behaviors may be contributing to your challenged. Then ask yourself “How am I giving away my power in this situation?”

Step 3: Name one, two even three ways you can take responsibility for your current reality.

Step 4: Choose any one from step 3 and break it down into smaller steps. Acknowledge that in doing so you have taken a step.

Step 5: Make a commitment to when you will act upon your first step – no more than 48 hours from when you begin this process. The sooner the better.

Step 6: After each step you take, acknowledge how you feel in order that you can see your ego quicker next time. (ie “At first I felt scared and reluctant like I was dragging my feet but the moment I picked up the phone and made that call I felt relieved and in my power.” In that moment, commit again to when you will be completing your next step. Repeat until all small steps are completed.

Step 7: Leave your comment so I can hear what you think!

Surrender to the Green Beans

One of my early spiritual teachers shared with me a story about her process of training to become a shaman.  She had traveled all over the world, learning from amazing spiritual masters.  Part of her last leg of preparation was working in a spiritual community, where each member of the community performed a certain task that would benefit the whole.  This task was assigned based on the inherent gifts each member had, as well as what would task was believed to most benefit each member’s spiritual growth and evolution.  With all her travels and through everything she had learned, she had secretly hoped she would have an “important” function.

What did her role turn out to be?  Her very important and oh so exclusive role was preparing shuck beans!  Umm, not exactly what she imagined.

Still she took on the task, thinking quickly it would be changed.  But after a few weeks of doing this, she grew incredibly bored and decided to mention something to the person who assigned tasks.  He assured her that preparing the beans the best place for her and where she was meant to be.

She would then go back to doing her work but she wasn’t enjoying it in the least.  She decided each week, she’d check in to see if she could be assigned a different task, something that would expand her gifts.  And each week, she was told again and again, green beans are where you are meant to be.

After months went by with the same rejection week after week, she reflected on how her strategy of trying to assert herself into a different position was not working.  She decided to dedicate herself whole-heartedly to preparing the green beans and let go of what she thought she ought to be doing instead.  She found herself becoming lost in the process she had learned so well.  At first it felt like a form of meditation and then it blossomed even further to have its own melody.  Soon she found herself signing as she performed her tasks.  Others noticed how happy and at peace she was.  It was then that she was told she had completed her task well and it was time for her to share all she has learned out into the world.

Although her heart had known for a long time she was going to be a spiritual teacher, she had not received all the lessons that would make her teachings fulfilling to her.  Her ego was trying to push and force the change that her heart so deeply wanted to create.  Yet, the heart’s language is not push, it is flow.  It is an internal melody that is found when you surrender to your current reality.

So many times when we reach this point when life isn’t working out as planned, we turn our backs on the tasks before us.   We want to say, “To hell with it!”  Or maybe you fall back into an old pattern of behavior that isn’t working, yet feels comfortable to you.

Do not confuse surrender with giving up.  The tasks are there for a reason –  to prepare you to share your gifts.  This doesn’t mean life is going to stay this way, as your ego would like you to believe.  If your ego, is like mine, it wants to get on with it and keep moving forward.   However, if you find yourself stuck, yet again, that is a sure sign there is something you are missing that will support you to move forward.  That is when you are being called to find acceptance in what this moment is trying to teach you.  Ask yourself “What do I need to learn about why my relationships, career, finances, physical health or whatever your current challenge is in this present moment?”

You will find your spirit/essence/authentic self is guiding you, once the pushy, assertiveness of your ego is witnessed.  Then it is your choice as to which voice you are going to follow.  When you whole-heartedly choose your essence, your ego’s job has been completed with this task and let’s go of the deep grip it had on you.  That is when you realize that your essence will always be the more difficult voice to trust, yet it is the only path to reap the rewards of your heart’s desires.  Til this day, I have kept a jar of baby food green beans on my meditation table to remind me to surrender to my own life’s unfolding by choosing my essence rather than my ego to be my guide.

Living Emotionally Conscious Together,

The Tree by Carlene Roberts

It started as a seed,

And at first was mistaken for a weed.

It felt so very small,

But always stood up tall.

When left alone to grow,

Its life energy began to flow.

The earth offered nurturance and love,

And the sun offered light and warmth from above.

The rain gave it nourishment,

As the wind offered encouragement.

All these combined to create a life force,

And then the circle of life simply took its course.

And then one day its strength and life burst forth with such might,

Its splendor and beauty beheld such a sight.

Then it merged with the earth and they became one,

It reflected the light and warmth back to the sun.

Its leaves gave the rain and wind a voice,

Together they had all made a choice.

They had joined together and turned the seed into a beautiful tree,

And it was indeed a breathtaking sight to see.

For as they all joined together as one,

They had created a harmony that could not be undone by anyone.

So if ever you feel weak and small,

Or feel like you’re about to fall,

Look around you and you will see

The strength and beauty of this tree.

Believe in yourself and don’t give up,

And realize that you’ve just hit a bump.

Stop and just simply be,

Find your life energy and set it free.

Then stand up to what you fear,

And pull your loved ones near.

There is more to this life than just you and me,

There is more than what you simply see.

Open yourself up and feel the power,

That exists even in the smallest flower.

And you will find the strength to stand up tall,

And no longer be afraid you’ll fall.

For within us all lies beauty, strength and light,

That you don’t find just with your sight.

Open yourself up and join as one,

And let your guide be the sun.

Don’t think about tomorrow,

Be true to yourself and it will follow.

Think of the seed that turned into a beautiful tree,

And let your spirit soar free.

And you will feel yourself straighten and stand up tall,

And never again will you feel small.

Remember it all started with a seed,

That once was mistaken for a weed.

If you would like to send your feedback to Carlene, you can email her directly at 4roberts@comcast.net

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